Monday, February 16, 2009

The Fun of Grocery Shopping

I think some warning system goes off whenever I go to Wal-Mart and all the stupid people are released from the local Stupid People Home. I have compiled a list of all the stupidity that I deal with:

  • People hold up all traffic waiting for a person to back out of a spot rather than parking in the one two spaces back. Apparently, burning those few extra calories will kill them.
  • There is always some woman trying to free a stuck cart rather than taking one from the neat line that the nice greeter lady has created. It never fails that I have to jump out of the way of the suddenly freed cart.
  • Seriously, who thought that putting the McDonald's right next to the entrance was a good idea?! The line always stretches past their door and those seeking their daily dose of sodium and fat don't move to let shoppers into the store. (Nevermind that if shoppers don't get in to shop, the store closes and there goes their fast food mecca...)
  • The middle of the aisle is not the place to catch up on all the gossip with your long-lost best friend. MOVE!
  • Don't judge what is in my cart. Last night, a woman with an overflowing cart full of junk food and frozen meals actually had the nerve to tell me that organic milk was a waste of my money. (Maybe her taste buds are so damaged that she can't taste the difference, but I can)
  • If you don't know how to operate the Self-Checkout (or if you have been drinking excessively before your shopping trip), step away from it. Also, if you have 500 items in your cart, stay away from the Self-Checkout.
  • The middle of the exit is also not the best place to catch up on all the goings-on in the backwoods with your long-lost Aunt Velma. MOVE!
  • Do not block the exit and then look at me like I've lost my mind when I politely say "Excuse me" and expect you to move your conversation slightly to one side.
I deal with this nonsense every time I go to the store, yet I still go...maybe I'm crazy...

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